Absentee

I was absolutely absent from my life this last week. I try to think about what I did and all I can think about was the sorrow in my body. It was hard. However! I am so excited to get back into the kick of things! (: Yesterday was the first day since Monday that I really felt alive and functioning, and today was even better!

Don't you absolutely love Sunday's? I mean it's a day completely chill. If you are religious you get to attend a sermon, and if you aren't religious you get to just kick back and relax all day. (Unless you work, my condolences.) In my case, since I'm LDS I get to attend what we call "Sacrament Meeting." Basically it's a one hour long meeting that we focus our thoughts and testimonies to Christ. 

Today when I took the sacrament I felt so amazing! It was like I was completely clean and pure of everything. I couldn't help but cry as I was silently praying, because I was so filled with gratitude that my Heavenly Parents delivered me from the awful week I had experienced. I was also so thankful that I had somebody who could fully and completely relate to my experience. He is the only being that could comprehend the pain that I felt, and that alone lifted a percentage of the burden.

I'm so grateful for the knowledge I have of the gospel. It isn't always easy to be LDS, but it's always worth it. When we were at Carissa and Jimmy's house on Friday I told Erron, as I glanced around the house at everybody and their beers, that all I wanted to do was drink. And he understood, to an extent, how I was feeling. The reason I enjoyed drinking my freshman year of college was because (I now understand) I was numbing the pain I was experiencing. But as hard as this last week was and as sad as I was feeling on Friday, a shot of something strong wasn't going to fix it in the long run. I'm sure it would have made my night better & probably a heck of a lot more fun, but it wouldn't have fixed anything. And I'm all about fixing and healing wounds! (:

I'm excited for tomorrow, and hope that I can kick butt in school this week!